Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant
This has to be one of the main questions I get asked a couple of weeks after a parent feels that their little one has mastered potty training. There is a quiet confidence that you get when you have had several days or weeks without any accidents, but then suddenly it is like you have gone back to when you first started potty/toilet training; your little one is having accidents and in some cases they don’t seem to be worried or upset by it, if anything some can seem to find it funny.
If it is of any reassurance this is extremely common and, for some, a normal part of the toilet training process. It is also important to note that children can be prone to the occasional accident in the weeks, months and, for some children, years after they are no longer in nappies. However, if your little one continues to have frequent and regular accidents each day then this is something that you will need to look at further to see what might be causing this.
What is potty training regression?
Potty training regression is when a child who has been reliably using the potty or toilet begins having regular accidents again. It might look like wet pants several times a day after weeks of dryness, a sudden refusal to go near the potty at all, or accidents at times of day when your little one had previously been managing well.
It’s important to tell the difference between a regression and a blip. Every child in the middle of potty training will have occasional accidents; that’s completely expected and not regression. Regression is a more sustained pattern: a step back that lasts more than a few days and feels meaningfully different to where things were before.
What could the reason be?
There are a few possible reasons and these can be:
Constipation. The bladder and bowel are very close together and if your child is constipated this can press on the bladder, which in turn can cause your child to have accidents. As well as this, if your child is constipated they might be resisting using the toilet in case it hurts or is uncomfortable. They can only hold for so long and this can then mean that they can have an accident. It is important to rule out constipation as a reason for accidents before looking at others. Have a look at our blog on constipation for more information. It is also important to note that although your child might be pooing once a day they may still be constipated.
Urinary Tract Infection (UTI). Some children they can develop a bladder (water) infection which can lead to them having accidents. It is important to get this checked out with your GP if you think this could be the cause – symptoms of a possible UTI can be found on the NHS website here.
Changes such as a new sibling, moving house, starting nursery etc. When children experience change it can sometimes lead to some form of regression which can include toileting. It is all about trying to explain and empathise with your child about the change that they are experiencing and, once they are feeling more comfortable with what’s happening, their toileting should resume to normal.
Developmental changes. Accidents can happen if your little one has learnt a new skill or is enjoying doing a new activity and doesn’t want to leave it. They may have FOMO (Fear of missing out) and so you need to offer reassurance that they can come back to what they are doing and they are not going to miss anything. It is important that you are able to notice when they are getting absorbed into something and encourage them to have ‘toilet time’.
They might not have been fully toilet trained. Sometimes we can think that we have successfully toilet trained our little one, but they are not actually as far down the process as we might think. When they start to have accidents we can think that they have gone backwards but in fact they are just continuing with the learning process and this is just the next stage before it is completely mastered.
A change in your approach. When we start toilet training our little ones it is often our complete focus, we are constantly watching and monitoring whether or not they need to use the potty or toilet and give it a great deal of attention. If they are successful with using the toilet/potty we are giving them that positive praise and reinforcement. As the weeks progress and we find that they are mastering this new skill, we tend to relax into it a little more and see as something that we don’t need to focus on quite so much (which is absolutely the right thing to do). However, if we look at it from our child’s perspective, for the last few weeks they have been getting lots of attention for this skill that they are learning - if this attention then starts to disappear they might be missing it and not really understand why it has reduced or stopped…especially when they are still using the toilet or potty. They then might then have that one accident (because they are distracted and not as aware as they were) and they see the attention that they gain from this. We are usually shocked and ask them questions like “why didn’t you go to the toilet?”, “Why didn’t you say you needed a wee?”, “You know that you need to use the potty for a poo” etc. Whilst this is not positive attention, it is attention, and this can be confusing. It can make them then test the theory of when do I get more attention? When I use the toilet or when I have an accident? If the answer is ‘when I have an accident’ you may find that this becomes more frequent.
Things you can do to help
Regular fluids Make sure that your child is drinking frequently. If your child is drinking well, then they will fill their bladder, and this will help the bladder to hold and then release. If they are not drinking enough they won’t have the feeling of their bladder getting full and then emptying fully.
When using the toilet/potty try and encourage them to sit there for a little longer than they might want to (only 10-20 seconds more) just to make sure that they have fully emptied their bladder. If you know that your little one needs to do a poo, then encourage them to be on the toilet for a minute or so longer so that it gives them time to do a poo if needed. We do have a blog on encouraging your little one to poo on the toilet/potty which also might be helpful – you can read it here.
Rather than asking your little one if they need a wee or poo, just say “it’s toilet time” and then take them off to the toilet. If you ask they are likely to say no and then this can lead to an accident, if you say that it’s ‘toilet time’ then this will get them into the mindset that this is something that they need to do and hopefully will encourage regular toilet trips independently over time.
Avoid getting upset or cross when they have an accident. If your child feels stress or upset from the situation this can in turn lead to more accidents, so it is important to remain calm. If they have an accident, try to take them to a bathroom and clean them up in that environment and you can always encourage them to try using the toilet or potty while you are there. This continues giving them the message that this is where they need to go to the toilet.
Keep noticing! When your little one has been successfully on the toilet or potty, then make sure that you acknowledge this, it doesn’t need to be anything huge but a “well done”, “great wee” or a high five etc in order to keep up that positive reinforcement.
Diet and exercise are important for keeping things moving through the body, so a balanced diet with a good fluid intake (water is best - avoid giving fizzy drinks and drinks like tea or squash that is dark in colour such as blackcurrant as they can aggravate the bladder. If your child will not drink water, then you can give them very weak, diluted light colour squash), along with regular exercise, will also help with toileting.
Go back to what was working we can often change our approach when we are a couple of weeks down the line and this can be unsettling for our children. Look back to see what was working well when you started potty training and go back to this, it might be that your child needs this approach for a little longer.
If you were using books with your little one about using the potty then perhaps start reading these together again as this may help with getting things back on track.
Don’t go back to nappies or pull-ups unless you really have to. If your child was pretty much there with toilet training, you have just hit a little bump in the road and this doesn’t mean that you need to go back to nappies or pull-ups. This should be the last resort - try some other things (as suggested above) before doing this.
For a reminder of the core basics, our guide on when and how to introduce the potty or toilet is worth revisiting.
How long does potty training regression last?
It varies. Most regressions, when handled calmly and consistently, settle within a few days to a few weeks. The quicker the trigger is identified and addressed, and the calmer and more consistent the response, the sooner things tend to settle.
Signs that a regression is resolving include a gradual reduction in accidents, your little one starting to go to the potty on their own again, and a return to the confidence and independence they had before. Progress is rarely perfectly smooth, so expect some days to feel better than others.
If you need to take a break
If you do decide that a short break from potty training is needed, frame it clearly and positively (“let’s have a little break and try again soon”) rather than as a consequence or a punishment.
When to get more support
Occasionally, regression is a sign that something else needs attention. This might be a physical issue such as constipation or a UTI, which is worth discussing with your GP. It might be significant emotional distress around toileting, such as a child who is very fearful or anxious in a way that feels out of proportion. Or it might simply be a regression that isn’t resolving despite a calm, consistent approach over several weeks. In any of these situations, one-to-one support can make a real difference.
Learning a new skill is not always a straightforward process, it can have highs and lows, and toilet training is certainly one of those skills that can take some time for little ones to master completely. Try to remain patient and calm, your little one will get there with time.
Frequently asked questions
Is potty training regression normal?
Yes, very. It happens to children who have been doing brilliantly as well as those who have been finding it trickier. A regression does not mean you’ve done anything wrong or that your little one has lost the ability to use the toilet. It almost always has a trigger, and it almost always passes.
How do I stop potty training regression?
The most effective approach is a calm, consistent return to the basics: regular toilet time at natural points in the day, neutral language around accidents, and plenty of positive attention when things go well. Gently identifying and addressing the trigger, such as a new sibling or a change in routine, is the other key piece. Avoid pressure or making it a bigger deal than it needs to be.
Could regression be a sign of a medical problem?
Occasionally, yes. If regression is very sudden, has no obvious emotional trigger, or comes with other symptoms such as pain, discomfort or changes in wee or poo, check in with your GP to rule out a physical cause such as a urinary tract infection or constipation.
If you want more information about potty / toilet training have a look at our other Toilet Training blogs or download our step by step video guide.
We also have a podcast with lots of episodes about toilet training - ‘Newborn to Teen and Everything in Between’ - listen here.
If accidents have crept back in and you’re not sure why, our toilet training consultations help you find the trigger and get things back on track.
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