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“History will judge us by the difference we make in the everyday lives of children" – Nelson Mandela

 

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Posts tagged child's perspective
My child only wants me!
My child only wants me!

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Our children can be very set on things at times and this can even be in relation to wanting one parent to do everything for them and to be with them all the time. We can often find in these situations that we have one parent who seems to be favoured over the other.

This behaviour can be extremely draining for the ‘preferred’ parent at the time and can be very difficult (and upsetting at times) for the other parent (the ‘rejected’ one) who feels that they are not wanted or, sometimes, not even liked or loved.

We must remember that this is not about who your child does or doesn’t like, it is all about your child learning and developing, which includes learning what relationships feel like and how to manage them. They are practicing something that they will have to deal with for years to come through friendships, relationships and also with work colleagues. It is all about making sense of how and why we feel what we do!

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Behaviour, Separation anxietyRebekah Frankcomparenting, families, parenting tips, parenting help, toddler behaviour, child development, parenting blog, kids behaviour, kids emotions, empathy, good communication, consistency, helpful links, parenting webinars, separation anxiety, my child only wants me, independence, preferred parent, rejected parent, child's perspective
How do you get children to appreciate what they have?
How do you get children to appreciate what they have?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. A question I often hear being asked, particularly around this time of year, is “Why don’t my children appreciate what they have?”. Naturally children ‘expect’ to receive gifts and presents around Christmas, Birthdays or perhaps when on days out etc., but some children appear to never be fully grateful or appreciative of the gift, the thought that went in to getting it or sometimes the cost of the gift.

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BehaviourRebekah Frankcomparenting, families, parenting tips, child's perspective, life skills, behaviour issues, appreciation, thank you, please, egocentric, appreciate, show appreciation, gratitude, sharing, family values, patience, responsibility
Why doesn’t my toddler like their new sibling?
Why doesn’t my toddler like their new sibling?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Introducing a new baby to a family is something that we all hope will be like we see on TV, arriving home with the other children who are so excited waiting to welcome their new brother or sister into the family. However, for some families this picture of family bliss is not always what happens. In my time working with families, I have experienced children asking when the baby is going back to the hospital, suggesting that the baby is sent back where it came from and I’ve even seen one little one pulling the bin over to his mummy and telling her to put the baby in it because he didn’t like him!

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Babies, Behaviour, SiblingsRebekah Frankcomparenting, families, parenting tips, child's perspective, life skills, behaviour, emotions, behaviour management, behaviour issues, toddler behaviour, fixing behaviour, rewarding behaviour, praise, recognise good behaviour, new baby, sibling, boundaries, sharing, separation anxiety, change, video guide to behaviour
Do reward charts work?
Do reward charts work?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. When looking at behaviour related issues, one of the most common strategies or ideas that is given as a solution is a reward system of some kind. This might be a reward chart, a star chart, marbles or pasta in a jar (etc.) - these are all related to encouraging ‘good behaviour’ and, in some situations, these might work.

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BehaviourRebekah Frankcomparenting, families, parenting tips, play things, child's perspective, life skills, reward stystems, reward charts, star charts, behaviour, emotions, behaviour management, behaviour issues, toddler behaviour, fixing behaviour, high five, rewarding behaviour, targets, setting targets, praise, recognise good behaviour
Why does my child do the same thing over and over again?
Why does my child do the same thing over and over again?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Does your child twirl round and round and round all the time or, do they always want to line their cars up in a straight line or, perhaps they want to drop or throw things from a height..?! Do you wonder why this might be?

Children are creatures of habit and it’s with good reason! These repetitive behaviours are all part of your child’s essential brain development, helping them to learn new skills and practice what happens when they do them. As babies you will have seen your child repeating an action until they were able to do it, and, as our children get older, these behaviours become more defined as their interests (and their brains) develop.

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PlayRebekah Frankcomparenting, families, parenting tips, play, playing together, play things, play time, child's perspective, life skills, schemas, repetition, trajectory, rotation, enclosing, enveloping, transporting, connecting, disconnecting, positioning, orientation
Why won’t my child share?
Why won’t my child share?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Sharing is often something that we want our children to be able to do from a young age. It is of course much more socially acceptable for a child to share things with other children than to snatch or refuse to let them near their possessions. Getting a child to understand that they need to share can sometimes feel like a long and difficult process. It can cause frustration for a child, who has these expectations on them when they might not fully understand, and also for the adults who want so much for their child to share!

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Play, BehaviourRebekah Frankcomparenting, families, parenting tips, play, playing together, sociable, communication, problem solving, toys, play things, play time, sharing, child's perspective, taking turns, life skills